Colts’ Braden Smith Opens Up About Mental Health Struggles and Suicidal Thoughts
Indianapolis Colts offensive tackle Braden Smith has opened up about a dark period in his life, revealing he struggled with a severe form of OCD known as “religious scrupulosity” that nearly led him to take his own life.
In a recent interview with IndyStar.com, Braden and his wife Courtney shared how his mental health spiraled during the 2024 NFL season. Things got so serious that he missed the final five games of the year and seriously considered retiring from football altogether.
The type of OCD he deals with causes intense anxiety and guilt tied to religious or moral thoughts. Braden said it got so bad that his wife changed the combination to their gun safe and wouldn’t leave him alone with their baby out of fear for his well-being.
“I was physically there, but mentally gone,” he said. “I didn’t care about football, my family, anything. I felt like I was just weeks away from ending it all.”
He described a mental tug-of-war between his faith and his OCD, saying it felt like his mind created a version of God that constantly judged and punished him for every small mistake.
Things reached a breaking point early in the season. After a win over the Bears, he told Courtney he was ready to quit. That was the moment she realized how serious it really was.
Braden eventually spent 48 days in a mental health facility. But what really made a difference for him was an alternative treatment involving Ibogaine and 5-MeO-DMT psychedelics used in Mexico that helped him start healing. Once back in the U.S., he began intensive therapy focused specifically on OCD.
“I still have it,” he said, “but it doesn’t control me anymore.”
His story comes shortly after Boston Red Sox player Jarren Duran also shared his mental health struggles, revealing he attempted suicide in 2022.
Braden Smith Gets Real: The OCD Struggle That Nearly Ended His Career and Life
